Bringing Oslo Earthside

On October 3rd, 2017 at 9:38AM we heard your cries for the first time. You were pink with a swollen little face and were placed directly onto Mama's chest with our wonderful midwives, Jenn and Anna, our Doula Lauren, and your doting father looking on.

Labor began around 1:20am as I awoke from a deep sleep to sharp, intense pelvic and hip pains that weren't easily distinguished at the time as contractions. After timing the surges for about 40 minutes, it was clear that labor had begun and the intensity had me taken by surprise. I decided to wake up your Dad and let him know that I felt like you were on your way. At one point I felt so caught up in the numbers, in timing my contractions that I was losing my sense of rhythm. I needed to listen to my body, and to you, and trust that you would guide me through.

In hindsight, I don't think your Dad took me seriously at first, and we joke now that he half expected to go back to sleep as labor was so long with your brother and the beginning stages were slow going and manageable. This was different. It felt intense and rhythmic, right out the gate, timing perfectly 2-3 minutes apart and varying from 60 to 90 seconds in length and taking my breath away with each new set. It took me quite some time to find a good rhythm, but with your Dad's unwavering support and encouragement I did. I switched between laying on my side in bed with the heating pad pressed firmly between my hips and sitting backwards on the toilet, rising with each contraction and swaying and squatting through the waves of fierce pain. Your Dad kept reminding me that each contraction had a purpose and to breathe deep and low, and to focus on bringing you down and out.

At around 6AM something drastically changed. I felt what I can only describe as dropping from within me and a change in pressure. We checked the time and realized that your brother, Archer, would be waking up within the next hour, and it may be a good idea to call our Doula, Lauren, so that Dad could be available for him when he woke. Your dad called Lauren and shortly after getting off the phone with her, I asked him to call Jenn. Hesitant at first, he dialled the phone as I was between contractions. Jenn answered and asked how I was doing and how I was acting. Your Dad believing in me irrefutably, said that I was doing good and managing well (I was not! I was freaking out and felt like there was no way I could go on. This was the point in which I started doubting myself and my body) As they were talking another strong surge began and after listening to me for what felt like .5 seconds, Jenn said she was on her way NOW.

In the time between our birth team arriving, I took the break between contractions to talk to your Dad about how I was feeling. I told him how scared I was to be checked and how I wasn't sure I could go on with the intensity and the frequency of the pain for another 6+ hours if I wasn't dialating. We slowly started packing a hospital bag as I admitted my defeat, Archer's birth story and the surprising effects it had on me ringing through my ears at the height of every wave (still coming 2-3 minutes apart, sometimes as often as 1 minute apart).

Lauren arrived shortly after 7am and Jenn followed closely behind. I laid out on our bed and held my breath as Jenn checked me. "How would you feel if I told you you were 8cm, Katie?" her voice echoes in my ears even now. I can feel the tears red hot filling up in my eyes and pouring down my cheeks. I was so relieved. Shocked. Amazed. My body was doing this, I was doing this. Jenn promptly called our back up midwife, Anna, and instructed Dad to put some towels in the drier for 30 minutes as we were having a baby!

Unfortunately, you had other plans, my sweet boy. I was starting to feel the need to push, and I was encouraged to follow my body. Jenn eventually broke my waters to see if that would encourage you to drop down lower and as she did, she noticed meconium present. This put us on a bit of a timeline, but in my heart I trusted you and your divine instinct to be born. Every few contractions, our midwives checked in on you and your heart rate to see how you were doing. Sometimes your little heart would beat very slow, and this, paired with the meconium present was cause for concern. We made the call to EMS just to be safe, and I pushed with all my might through each and every wave.

By this time, it was about 9 o'clock and Archer woke up. Your Dad fixed him some oatmeal for breakfast, but unfortunately it wasn't like how Mama makes it so he sat on the couch eating a banana with Lauren instead. I needed your Dad close to me as I urged you to come Earthside, and I could sense Archer's unease with Lauren, and so we made the decision to call Auntie Jess to come take Archer for a walk. She arrived and wisked your brother away just in time for the ambulance and fire trucks to show up- A new brother and a free show for Archer, how exciting!

While all this was taking place, I was pushing and pushing with everything in me and Jenn kept saying that she could feel a lip of something, possibly my cervix preventing you from dropping down into my pelvis fully. With hands gentle yet firm, and with every contraction she worked together with my body and you to help you be born.

EMS arrived and instantly I felt panicked. The swift change in the energy of my birthing space made me lash out and scream at everyone to stop talking over and around me while I was working so hard. My entire body went into overdrive and after 3 or 4 more contractions I could feel you engage. My body felt like it was being torn in two, like I was about to burst apart and bits of me would fly across the room at any second. How will they ever put me back together, I thought to myself. I pushed again, and the room fell silent, and then, "What is that?" "Is that a bum?" "That's not a head...." "omg" "omg those are baby's LIPS!!!" "And there's the rest of his face!!!" I wish I could have a video of that moment because everyone was shocked to see your tiny, swollen face appearing just as my contraction ended. Lauren had just enough time to snap a quick photo and with the next contraction you were born, our second son, perfect and crying on October 3rd, 2017, 9lbs 15.5oz, 22.8 inches long. The warm gush of your body sliding out of me after the marathon that brought us to this moment mixed with the euphoria of a redeeming birth kept me on a high that carried me through the next several weeks. Dad and I cried so many happy tears with the weight of your perfect self on my chest. Your swollen lips, your blonde hair, your huge hands. The stress and uncertainty of life leading up to you vanished. You were here and ours, and I somehow wondered how we were ever us without you.

We laid in bed and Archer was brought in to meet you. He was unsure, and more worried about Mama than anything. We reassured him that everything was fine, and that Mama just did a big job and was tired and hungry. He fed me muffins in bed and played with his new trains and ate grapes. He went down for a nap about an hour later and when he woke up we walked to the park; our new family of four. You, bundled against my chest, living this new, busy life straight out the gate, right along side us. You had taught us patience, compassion, and understanding in just your first few moments of life, and the wild fire that you are somehow fits in perfectly with us.

I got the birth I so desperately hoped for, but honestly didn't think I could do... or that my body was capable of. We had a healthy baby, who has grown into a vivacious, loud, and busy one year old. It’s hard to imagine you any bigger than you are right at this moment. You are our baby, and probably always will be.